Senator Judy McIntyre wants to declare, ‘Swing Low, Sweet Chariot,’ the official state gospel song.  If passed, SB 73 would add ‘Swing Low’ to the states growing list of official songs.  Rodgers and Hammerstein’s ‘Oklahoma!’ was appointed the official state song in 1953, Woody Guthrie’s ‘Oklahoma Hills’ was declared the state’s folk song in 1988, and in 2009 the Flaming Lips’ ‘Do You Realize’ was pronounced Oklahoma’s official rock song.

Ever heard of Jimson weed?  Neither had we.  Senator Kim David introduced SB 237, to classify Jimson weed as a Controlled Dangerous Substance.  A quick search uncovered this helpful and horrifying mnemonic device for remembering the clinical symptoms of Jimson consumption – “red as a beet, dry as a bone, blind as a bat, and mad as a hatter.”  Apparently, recreational use of Datura Stramonium (AKA Jimson weed) can cause hallucinations, psychosis, violent delirium, and death.  Carry on, Senator David.

A bill that really has us scratching our heads – Representative Tom Newell wants to require written approval from the Director of Wildlife Conservation to sell taxidermy specimen at an estate sale and forbid the sale of taxidermy specimen that are not personal property of the owner of the estate.  Given that the function of an estate sale is presumably to sell the possessions of the dear departed, it seems HB 1348 wants Great Uncle Earl’s family to think twice before selling off Great Uncle Earl’s prized mounted 10 point buck by getting written permission from a state agency.  Are taxidermy specimens a public health hazard that we are unaware of?  Has House District 28 been plagued by unauthorized taxidermy sales?  We don’t get it.

A bill we are dubbing the ‘Who Let the Dogs Out Act’, HB 1249, would allow individuals to enter the adjoining property of another if they are in the process of retrieving their domestic livestock or other animals.  If a cow wanders into your neighbors pasture, Representative Wade Rousselot wants you to be within your rights to collect the mischievous animal without fear of trespassing.  Even if this bill passes, we suggest proceeding with caution onto any property with ‘trespassers will be shot’ signage.

Representative Charles Key wants to treat politicians like middle schoolers. HB 2067 would require all candidates for state and federal office in Oklahoma to complete a fill-in-the-blank exercise at the Election Board. An excerpt: “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of ___________, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of ____________, or of the press;” Apparently Key thinks candidates need to prove that they can Google the Bill of Rights.

Finally, in an attempt to ruin middle school slumber parties the state over, HB 1320 wants henna tattoos – the functional equivalent of writing on yourself with a sharpee – to have the same legal classification as a regular tattoo or body piercing.  If henna is the same as a tattoo, then the Girl Scouts of America should start riding with the Hell’s Angels.  Tattoos are permanent and injected into the skin with a needle, henna dye is drawn on top of the skin and washes off in a week or two.  I’m guessing those temporary tattoo dispensers at the mall aren’t quite as magical to Representative Harold Wright as they are to me.

Have you come across any other bills this session that might amuse OK Policy readers?  Tell us about it in the comments section below.  If you want to join the fun, click here for a list of bills and find your own favorite.  And if you want a refresher about what happens to these bills after they are introduced, don’t forget about our indispensable 2011 Legislative Overview.

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If you follow Oklahoma legislative issues, the Overview will serve as a handy, informative reference guide, whether you are a veteran lawmaker or a novice advocate. We can honestly say that our Overview is the only resource that compiles updated 2011 information about such topics as legislative leadership, members of the Executive, and appropriations history in a single place. To take advantage of this unlimited time offer, just go to our website where the Overview can be viewed online or downloaded for the insanely low price of free – although should you wish to make a donation to help us continue to make resources like this available, we would certainly appreciate it.

We hope you find the Overview useful, and we hope you will stay informed and engaged over the course of the upcoming legislative session.

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Early bird registration ends this Friday, October 2 and all registration ends next Tuesday, October 6. For directions, an agenda, and online registration, see OICA’s web site.

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